Saying Goodbye is the Hardest Part of my Day



Had this first experience three weeks ago.  Brad and I drove together and we pulled up to Cody’s new school.  I got out in the drop off line and unbuckled him.  A teacher ran out to meet us and took Cody’s hand and they walked in. It all happened so fast, he never shed a tear.

The teacher that was working the cross walk happened to be a very close friend and she immediately gave me a hug and said some comforting words and told me she would poke her head in his room in about 30 minutes to see if he is doing ok.  I distracted myself into social media just to try to keep my mind off things so I would not cry. When we approached the signal light, I had texted our oldest son, Cameron to let him know that we were headed back and would pick him up to take him to school. He immediately asked,”How did he do?” I answered he did great and no had tears!” He sent back a (heart) him.

That is when the tears started to fall down my face.  You see its a different type of sadness with Cody. When he does not speak, your mind begins to wonder how strangers will be able to pick up on his needs and wonder when he is frightened by new friends, new environment, strange sounds and bright florescent lighting, how will he tell his teachers how these may make him feel.  Then you question, maybe this is exactly what he needs to push him to start speaking?  You see Brad and I are not always that easy on him and over time we have learned to make him ask in his ways through sign, pictures, eye contact or taking your hand and leading you to what he needs but what makes its so touch for me is when he cant tell you his emotions and how he is feeling.  And his tolerance for pain is so high, that makes me scared at times too!

10 minutes after the bell and his teacher sent me this.


20 minutes later, I get this from a dear friend.


Cody only attends 2 days a week right now. On his second day, I texted the teacher to let her know I was here to pick up and she asked if I could come in. She quickly checked me in to take me to the cafeteria to witness the progress already made with self feeding with the Occupational Therapy he is receiving.  Where I was so excited about this progress I was also more excited to seeing him sit at a table of 10 friends surrounded by about 10 more tables of friends and he was loving it!  She shared a great photo of this day too where eh attended his first assembly in the gym.


On his 3rd day he had already made the school twitter page showing off some of the signs he is learning with his teacher.


We are 3 weeks in, I LOVE HIS TEACHER, I LOVE HER PARA and all the hard work paid off with the countless hours spent with the school district in meetings.  We seem to have a nice blend for Cody right now and something is clicking and we like what we are seeing.  With the change in the schedule and the hard work this boy is putting in we have seen more days like this photo below while he is eating or commuting between therapies. I see why parents with children with Autism truly call them Super heroes. It’s because they are.



Published by mamalamaneustupa

Bio My name is Shelley Neustupa. I am a mother of two cool boys and a wife of 22 years to my high school sweetheart. My oldest son attends the University of Oklahoma. Boomer! My youngest is in 2nd grade and was diagnosed with Autism and Mixed Receptive Expressive Disorder at age 2. Since his diagnosis, I promised him I would advocate and educate as hard as he works each day in therapy. I began writing and have been able to touch many parents that may be new to this journey providing them with actual experiences (not candy coated), support and resources through my entries. Writing is my therapy and my hope one day that my nonverbal son will be able to take these diaries and speak about his own journey and how autism relates to his own experiences. Who knows he and his older brother may become National Speaker’s one day? Come along on our journey to better understand our lives through the eyes of a boy with autism, his Skilled Companion dog Jude, his big brother (and best friend) and mom and dad. My raw vulnerability captures the everyday moments of our journey and will bring even more awareness. A week does not go by where we do not learn something new about ourselves and I want to share these chapters with you. My Sons Undeniable Strengths… Extremely smart and figures out things quickly. Has a memory that allows him to remember more things than I could ever hope for. Persuasive by his personality and sheepish looks. Overabundance of stamina and strength. Loves the outdoors. Enjoys life and always has fun with an unforgettable smile. You can find us here: Writer: Autism Through His Eyes Facebook Instagram YouTube Pinterest Canine Companions for Independence News Interview Cody and Skilled Companion Jude - Our Story

7 thoughts on “Saying Goodbye is the Hardest Part of my Day

    1. Thank you so much Cindy. I love to write and hope others can gain more understanding through our eyes. Autism looks so different for all children. 💙Looking forward to seeing you at Conference!


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